Yesterday I was walking to the post office, and I came across one of those plushie reindeer antlers that people put on their cars as a seasonal decoration. It was lying by the side of the road.

"Either the car was a male, shedding late, or a female, shedding very early," I mused. [Reindeer antler facts here! Learn the truth behind the social media posts!]

Later I passed a small silver glint. A dime.

"Hey! Hey!" the dime called. "You're just going to walk by and leave me here, as if I were a PENNY or something? You're so rich you can't use a dime?! Well not for long, sister, not with that attitude!"

I went back and picked it up.

On the way back from the post office, I saw a perfect, long, tapered, thick orange carrot lying in the middle of someone's front lawn.

Ah, evanescence. One moment you're a snowman in the prime of life, and the next moment, you're just a carrot, waiting to be carried off by a posse of squirrels or an opportunistic deer.